This is another quiz-like thing since the last one had so many questions that didn’t apply to a straight white male. You copy it and change the answer to be your own. Then don't send it to me. Just mass email it to everyone in your address book, sort of like a virus only on purpose.
OK, here we go:
I stole this from the blog of Stacy the Peanut Queen, who stole it from A Girl Called Inky.
Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says: Full Moon Thur 24. Hey, your bad luck it was a calendar book.
Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first? A receipt from Best Buy. Again, your bad luck.
What is the last thing you watched on TV? James Bond
Without looking at the clock, guess what time it is:
Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? A distant thumping sound that I’m about to get up and go investigate.
When did you last step outside?
What were you doing? Coming inside the house after work. Woo hoo!
Before you came to this website, what did you look at? http://www.bizarremag.com/bizarre_beauties.php# because Noel emailed and asked that I vote for her. So now that you know the address, please click it and vote for Noel, age 27.
What are you wearing? A long sleeve shirt from The Giant Corporate Bank I work at, long pants, and socks
Did you dream last night? Yes, Heather Graham finally returned my calls and we got together. Then my alarm went off, dammit.
When did you last laugh? When my wife farted as I was tucking her into bed.
What is on the walls of the room you are in? Paint, a calendar with Jessica Van Der Steen smiling at me, a Karate Striking Points poster, a metal Titanic sign, and a photo of my car.
Seen anything weird lately? Yes, in the toilet before I flushed I thought I saw a turd shaped like the 10 Commandments. I was going to try to sue the state of Tennessee for it, but then it was gone.
What do you think of this quiz? I am too tired to think. That’s probably why I’m stealing quizzes.
What is the last film you saw? James Bond “You Only Live Twice”
If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first? A bunch of land and a big house just outside of
Tell me something about you that I do not know: I stole your quiz after Stacy stole it from you first. And I don't think you even know I exist here so this could be my answer to this question for the next 50 years.
If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? All women would be as good-looking as Heather Graham and want to throw themselves at me.
Do you like to dance? Have you seen me dance? It isn’t pretty. No, I don’t much enjoy it.
George Bush: Is there a question associated with this? OK, my answer is Carbon. No, Sulfate. Wait, can I change back to my original answer?
Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? Propecia Allegra Placenta. We’ll call her ‘Ally.’
Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? Viagra Ephedra Creatine. We’ll call him ‘Ed.’
Would you ever consider living abroad? If my pay was tax-free and higher than I’m getting now, yes. In fact, I think I hear Iraq calling.
Name Four Bad Habits You Have:
1. I steal quizzes
2. I blog about things from work, such as my boss and my attractive female coworker (not anymore)
3. I expect too much intelligence from other drivers in traffic
4. I take too much shit from rotten people
Name Four Things That You Wish You Had:
1. $50 billion
2. Heather Graham
3. A nice home in a nice town with 100 acres of land and good friends living close by
4. Washboard abs
Name Four Scents You Love:
1. I have no sense of smell. Maybe I should have put this under “something about you that I do not know?”
2.
3.
4.
Name Four Things You'd Never Wear:
1. A thong
2. Someone else’s dirty underwear
3. A Che Guavera shirt
4. Anything Graham Norton wears on his show
Name Four Things You Are Thinking About Now:
1. This stupid quiz
2. How uncomfortable this chair is
3. Heather Graham naked
4. The stock market
Name Four Things That You Have Done Today:
1. Resubmitted several tokens from the error queue at work (you don’t have to understand)
2. Talked with CSC about issues relating to the hash servers (you don’t have to understand this either)
3. Stopped at an Indian man’s Hallmark store to get even more Valentine’s stuff for my wife
4. Stole quizzes from Stacy’s blog
Name the Last Four Things You Have Bought:
1. DVDs of James Bond movies
2. Hallmark stuff for my wife for Valentine’s Day
3. Mary Kay stuff for my wife for Valentine’s Day
4. A sub at Quiznos.
Name Four Bands/Groups Most People Don't Know You Like:
1. Green Day
2. Paula Cole
3. Stevie Ray Vaughan
4. Train
Name Four Drinks You Regularly Drink:
1. Water
2. Coffee
3. More water
4. And more coffee
Yippee. Isn't this exciting? It's all over. Now you know just about as much about me as you did before, and perhaps more than you ever wanted. Now go bombard all your friend with this. You know they do the same thing to you all the time. It's payback time!
