I said I was keeping an eye out for Ass Rider Boy, as he is so entertaining to all of us who have to share the road with him.
Today I saw something that made me think I must be insane. I saw a Gold Ford Explorer, with a camouflage ribbon on the back, and tag number 'D' above a 'U' followed by 3002 (again, this is not the real tag number.) I kept looking at this truck and thinking, this can't be just a coincidence can it? Surely I couldn't remember something I stared at for so many miles so completely wrong, could I? Is this Ass Rider Boy?
I pulled next to him at the 4 way stop on Trinity. I tried to see him through his windows, but they are dark tinted. As I looked over at him he bolted.
Just for the heck of it I sped after him, just to see if he was just a fast driver impatient at the stop sign or if he was actually running from me. I caught up to him at the next intersection as we both came speeding up to a Memphis cop waiting at the red light. I looked the SUV over and over. It had all the identifying marks, from the ribbon to the odd license tag, yet the details are not at all what I remember from my 2nd encounter with the Ass Boy.
I could do a search on this tag and see if it is the same guy except for one thing, his paperwork is not going to say, "Mr. Ass Rider Boy." It's just going to have some name I don't recognize anyway. What good is that?
No wonder eye witnesses are considered so useless. When I first wrote about the initial encounter with Ass Rider, I had remembered it as a gold SUV and wrote it that way. When I encountered him next I looked at this green Chevy Blazer and didn't recognize him as being the same person. Everyone has a ribbon on the back of their SUV. It's his tag that is so unique (and his driving.) I changed my original blog from a gold SUV to a green Chevy because I thought I had remembered the first encounter wrong, but now I think I had it right initially.
So, does Ass Rider Boy have a gold Ford Explorer or a Green Chevy Blazer?
Are there two different Ass Rider Boys? If so, why did the guy in the second encounter act like such a complete jackass? Or does he have 2 SUVs, one belonging to his momma and the other his own?
How could I look right at his truck and get the color and manufacturer so wrong? Or did I?
Is Cordova just packed full of nuts? You know, this third encounter took place right in front of the apartments where I first encountered Lesbian Elvis. Maybe that is not an apartment complex at all. Maybe it is an insane asylum.
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