Then one foggy Christmas Eve .... it's really foggy outside today. My cats, apparently convinced that the fog is going to melt their faces off, fought me like lunatics to not go outside this morning.
I won. Yay me!
So right this moment I'm sure my girl cat is still sitting on the kitchen windowsill whining and crying to herself. My boy cat is probably still sitting on the back doorstep, not making a sound because Maine Coons rarely do. And I am sitting here in my non-foggy office typing this whilst farting due to my not having pooped yet this morning.
You knew I was going to mention the pooping, didn't you? Yes you did.
I have My Wife's Christmas present already. I got an Ipod Nano in her favorite color along with the arm band pouch so she can wear it to jog or speed-walk. A coworker then told me I could download something called Shareaza and find all the MP3s she could want and download them.
Shareaza raises an important issue for me. I was setting it up and searching around for this and that, when I stumbled on an old '80s film starring Ginger Lynn. OK, this is porn. Fine, I like '80s "movies" just fine. But the film also supposedly has Tracy Lords in it. I'm no porn expert and I don't remember all the details of everything that went on in the '80s, but I seem to recall while watching Tracy Lords' biography on The Biography Channel that a lot of people got into trouble because of her, but then it was all dismissed. So what does this mean for today?
I didn't get to run yesterday at lunch. My boss is in town and took the team out for lunch. We went to O'Charleys. I can't speak about all the O'Charleys throughout the country, but I can certainly comment on the local one. It sucks. When we first moved to this hole, I mean town, it was one of the few decent restaurants in town. I don't know if someone new bought it or died or became a drug addict or what, but it suddenly went downhill and has never come back uphill again. We had a table of 12 people. We had between us 24 forks and 2 knives. We spent most of our meal this way, despite mentioning to the waiter that we had no knives and needed them. He, not trusting that anyone in the kitchen would supply him with the missing knives, just went around to the other tables and searched the silverware napkins for knives. He brought us two more knives. So that makes 12 people, 24 forks, and 4 knives. Yeah, not gonna work. So as soon as he left I got up and went and stole my own damned knife. At least I had a knife, even if 7 of my coworkers did not. What the hell is wrong with people?
He also got my order wrong. And generally everything about the service was messed up. Last time I ate there with My Wife there was a bunch of broken plastic pieces in her food with her steak. That was never explained.
I might mention that this last time our waiter looked just like Howdy Doody. Yeah, he was before my time, too, but you can still Google him and see my waiter. I swear it's true.
Can you imagine actually being named 'Doody?' I mean, what a living hell your childhood would be. Not that your adult life would drastically improve without a name change.
"Hello Mr. Doody, how are you today?"
"Ted, I'd like to introduce you to my new employee. This is Mr. Doody."
"WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION, PRIVATE DOODY?! DID YOUR MOMMA NOT LOVE YOU ENOUGH? I'M GONNA RIP OFF YOUR HEAD AND SHIT DOWN YOUR NECK, DOODY!"
"I now present you with Mr and Mrs Doody."
"And now President Doody is exiting Air Force One and ... oops, he slipped and fell down the stairs!"
Yeah, pure hell.
And here's something new. On StealthBombshell's blog I cannot comment and it does not even offer to let me comment as 'other' or 'anonymous'. It insists that I enter my Google login and password, but it rejects them when I do. Yeeha. This is fabulous.
You have read this article with the title Merry Christmas - part V. You can bookmark this page URL http://thebohemianbunny.blogspot.com/2006/12/merry-christmas-part-v.html. Thanks!
