Monday Mental Meandering


Stormy

Wow, it's Monday and I haven't got much to talk about. We've had rain, thank God, after a long drought that had officials warning about fires and the possibility of fires, but last night it stormed. It stormed so hard it knocked down all my solar lights along the sidewalk. As a result, I learned that some of my solar lights, when they end up knocked down and laying in a puddle, will just sit and flash on and off, endlessly, and I have no idea how to make them stop doing it.

And as usual, with the rain came a total mental breakdown among all the drivers in traffic. I don't know why this happens, because it rains here a lot, but whenever it does all the drivers suddenly seem to forget that they can still drive pretty much normally, with just a little more caution, even when there is water falling from the sky and the road is shiny. I had a guy seemingly begging me to hit his new car. And I was very tempted to take him up on it.



"Turn left at the next intersection"

My mother had a home alarm system installed in her house a few months ago. Every other week or so, she has to ask me how to work it. I try to explain it to her as best as I can, but within a short time she's forgotten again and is back asking. One thing which I cannot explain, though, is why the voice on the alarm sounds like Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.

It's an undeniable trend here in the Feminist States of America that every single electronic gadget that talks to you is automatically programmed with a female voice. Most do not even allow you the option of changing the voice to something you prefer. My father was almost totally deaf to most female voices and couldn't have heard Dr. Quinn telling him the alarm was on, just as he couldn't have heard the woman in the GPS unit in people's cars telling them when to turn or change lanes, etc. Luckily, Dad came from a generation that knew how to read maps, so he never paid any attention to the women in the GPS units that he couldn't hear anyway.



Robber Barons

President Obama made a speech in which he insisted that the solution to the massive economic crisis that he and his party nearly singlehandedly created in 3 short years was to raise taxes and then spend that money. I believe a previous US President named Reagan referred to this failed policy as "tax and spend" and did the opposite in order to save us from the economic disaster that Jimmy Carter created. I find it not at all ironic that people call Obama "Jimmy Carter part 2".

Come to think of it, former US President Kennedy did the opposite of Obama, too. But then Johnson came after him and did exactly what Obama is doing. It seems to be set in stone here in this country that for every good President we have, right after them comes a total shithead. And if not right after, then shortly thereafter.



Snotty

My allergies have been kicking my ass. I feel terrible even as I'm writing this, with snot running down the back of my throat and my nose raw from blowing it. I'm sure you were just dying to know that, so I made sure to tell you. You're welcome.



"No, I don't need a bra. They stay up by themselves."

I just did an internet photo search for the word "allergies" and every single photo returned was of a woman. That doesn't surprise me since every internet search engine I have access to is in the US, a fully vaginafied nation. But one thing I found entertaining is that when you do a search of the internet for "hot girl on 30 Rock" every single returned link is of Katrina Bowden. There isn't any confusion at all as to who this search is referring. And yes, I was watching "30 Rock" when I did this. It was a rerun of the episode from season one where Tina Fey's character tries to make Katrina Bowden's character stop dressing so sexy, wear a bra and look more professional. So of course the entire show long Katrina is shown wearing lots of skimpy clothes and no underwear and even bounces her breasts around to show that she doesn't think she needs a bra.

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