Stolen Meme

I wasn't tagged for this. I just flat out stole it. From a former cop, even.

A - Attached or Single?
It's attached, but it's not a single. It's a 2-car, plus storage space.

B - Best Friend:
I don't know, but if you ever show up at my house wearing kneepads and a smile then perhaps you can be my best friend.

C- Cake or Pie:
What kind of cake or pie? Some cakes are better than pie, and some pies are better than cake. For example, I'll bet Carmen Electra's pie is fabulous.

D- Drink of Choice:
I do believe at this moment it is Shiner Bock, hand-delivered from Dallas, Texas, by the Queen herself.

E - Essential Item:
I used to answer this question with "athletic cup", but as I later discovered in a soccer game which ended with me in the ER, it doesn't help all that much. In fact, it was pretty much useless. So now I say, powerful pain killers.

F - Favorite Color:
Red

G - Gummi Bears or Worms?
Bears. I once traumatized the future Miss Alabama, Heather Howard, with gummy worms. She thought less of me after that and I was sad.

H - Hometown:
The Rocket City

I - Indulgence:
Um, blogging?

J - January or February?
January, 'cause lots and lots of bad things have happened to me in February. Not that January has been a picnic.

K - Kids:
If I could find a wife who loved me enough, I might

L - Life is incomplete without:
Sperm. See, 'cause you'd just have all these eggs and no sperm and then there'd be no fertilization. It's funnier if I don't have to explain it.

M - Marriage Date:
You shouldn't date during your own marriage. That's just rude.

N - Number of Siblings:
Fore!

O - Oranges or Apples?
I ate one of each at supper tonight. Do I win a prize or anything?

P - Phobias/Fears:
Life not getting any better than this

Q - Favorite Quote:
"I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know." - Groucho Marx

R - Reasons to smile:
Shiner Bock

S - Season:
Hockey

T- Tag Three:
Kami
Dixie
Kentucky Fried Girl

U - Unknown Fact About Me:
I was Captain Vader of Yendor on LambdaMoo. Never heard of LamdaMoo? Don't worry about it.

V - Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals?
There's no chance to oppress them. They're already disassembled and wrapped in plastic by the time I get to them.

W - Worst Habit:
Caring about issues I can't do shit about.

X - X-rays or Ultrasounds?
Ultrasounds 'cause they don't give you no cancer, but they is kinda messy 'n all that.

Y - Your Favorite Foods:
Pizza, Barbecue pork plate, Rocky Road ice cream, um ... I don't know.

Z- Zodiac:
Aquarius - the soggy dude.
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