Thursday Things

Joe Paterno was fired today. A gay coach who worked with him, or worked at Penn State, or something, was seen raping a young boy in the locker room by an assistant several years ago. The assistant told Coach Paterno. Coach Paterno told his superiors. Whatever his superiors did with the information, I don't know, but they didn't call the police. Now, all these years later, the story is out and it turns out that the coach raped several boys. So now all the coaches are fired and the news media is reporting that a Penn State football coach sexually assaulted 'children.'

Look, that guy's raping that other guy

No, ladies, he didn't sexually assault 'children'. He specifically raped boys. He rammed his penis into the anal regions of young boys while fondling their very external and totally vulnerable male genitalia. But because we live in a society that protects the reputation of gays at all costs, while simultaneously celebrating, encouraging and laughing at sexual violence and abuse of males, our news media feels that it has to censor the truth of the story and edit it to be about 'children'. Thus they give casual readers the impression that this bad man molested young girls like all the pretend sex offenders we see on CBS every night of the week, which is not what he did.

All that is required for evil to triumph
is for good men to do nothing

Why crucify Joe Paterno while not dragging the actual rapist out into the street and hanging him from a tree for being a vicious sexual predator? Because the victims are all male, that's why. And we don't know what to do with that. And also because the rapist is gay, and we don't punish gay people because we fear being called 'homophobic' more than we fear serial sexual abusers who target boys. And that is just wrong.

I'm gonna eliminate 3 government agencies ... uh ...

The Republican debates were on CNBC last night. Mitt Romney decided to go sans makeup this time, ostensibly to set himself apart from Michelle Bachmann who wears a lot of it. As it turned out, one of the CNBC commentators, who looks like a Kardashian only shorter and less attractive, decided to wear all the makeup that he didn't, plus her own, at the same time. She looked like a psycho clown. Or maybe it was her personality that made her seem that way? Anyway, Rick Perry stated that he would eliminate 3 government agencies if elected president, and then forgot what the third one was. It was a huge mistake, and was all over Twitter as the biggest thing going, right up until ....

Ashton Kutcher tweeted that he thought the whole Penn State scandal was being overblown and he didn't see why Coach Joe Paterno was being fired. He admitted to not knowing all the details of the situation, but having 8 million followers, all of whom apparently knew more about the scandal than he did, the seemingly innocent tweet turned into a blood bath, with 8 million Tweeters building a wooden cross and immediately nailing Mr Kutcher to it while calling him "Kelso" and accusing him of defending a child rapist.

"What the hell just happened?"

Rumor has it Rick Perry called Ashton later that night to thank him for taking the heat off him and his little brain fart earlier in the evening.

You're not out of balls, silly!

Meanwhile, pro golfer John Daly was kicked out of Australia for ..... running out of balls! No, seriously, he ran out of balls. And then he had a fit. And then he walked off the course of a major PGA tournament that he was only able to enter due to a special invitation. And then his wife took a swipe at a TV camera. And then the Australian golf association made it clear he would never be invited back again.

Curly, Moe and Larry

Meanwhile, the stock market has been going up and down like a kid on a trampoline in response to the goings on in Europe, with every single bit of it being pure speculation on the part of investors. They have no idea what the end result is going to be, yet every time European politicians offer a glimmer of hope investors send the market flying upward. Then the hope is dashed and the investors send the market crashing down again. Yay, so much fun!

I can't wait to get out into traffic!

Closer to home, we've had a cold snap plus a full moon. Guess what that means? Yes, totally batshit crazy people in rush hour traffic! YAAAAY! I wasn't sure if I was going to make it home alive tonight without some sort of fist fight on the side of the highway. Oh, and I passed a 5-car collision that nearly caused me to have a wreck, too. More yaaaaay!

Let's see, what else interesting happened just this week? Oh yes, the entire city of Birmingham, Alabama, the largest city in Alabama, has declared bankruptcy after a very, very corrupt mayor and his cronies basically robbed the city blind for years. The media helped him get away with it by covering over his abuses the entire time because, well you know, he's politically correct. And by that I mean, either he's gay, a woman, or black. You choose which one it was. I don't care. I don't live there.

Mayor Larry Langford - robber of Birmingham

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