Wicked Wednesday

male bashing video game

Male Bashing Packaged and Marketed as a Video Game

There's a new female-only video game out. It's called "Hey Baby" and it's a first person shoot'em up game in which a woman walks down the street shooting and killing various random men for the 'crime' of speaking to her. The ever-female supremacist media is thrilled about it, celebrating the blatantly sexist nature of the game. The game is currently sold out, indicating that not only do a substantial number of women consider misandric sexism to be acceptable, but highly desirable and thus profitable as well. Expect a flood of misandric video games following the success of this one. Male bashing is easy money.


pedro power

Pedro and Jose Live Longer Than You

A new study has found that in the United States, Hispanics outlive whites and blacks both, by several years. The US Congress, the single largest exploiter of illegal alien labor, has indicated that this is a non-issue and nothing to be concerned about. "As long as it isn't white males outliving anybody there is no problem here", a US Government official representing the White House said.


Obama templing

Obama Objects to Americans Fear of his Marxism

US President Barack "Daddy Warbucks" Obama is accusing Republicans of "fear mongering" and cites the American voters' overwhelming fear of President Obama's destructive Marxist policies as proof. "The American People are utterly terrified of what I'm doing to the economy, not only of America, but the entire world, with my progressive redistribution of wealth policies. I am the first black Robin Hood and I should be celebrated, worshipped even, for my great achievements and social justice policies. There is simply no excuse for Americans to be afraid just because I might be damaging the future of America a little bit."


gay republicans

Gay Old Republicans

Almost as if in response to the criticisms the Tea Party has leveled against the Republican Party leadership and its stubbornly out-of-touch policies, a tiny, but powerful homosexual wing of the Republican Party, the Log Cabin Republican, have successfully sued the United States military to end its "Don't ask, don't tell" policy for homosexuals serving in the armed forces. The lawsuit could not possibly be further out of sync with the views and values of conservative Republican voters. The lawsuit illustrates clearly the chasm of disconnect that exists between the voters and the Republican Party leaders, who have recently allied with Democratic Party leaders in a join effort to crush the Tea Party uprising in what can only be described as the most self-serving and short-sighted effort ever by Republican Party leaders. Tea Party supporters, should they ultimately abandon the Republican Party, would leave the Republican Party a tiny shadow of its former self, irrelevant and unwinnable in any future elections.


gay pianist

Peking Penis Pianist

An armless pianist has won the first ever season of "China's Got Talent" by playing the piano with his genitalia. "It's truly amazing to see," one noticably excited Chinese woman said. "I have never seen any man do what this man can do with his dingaling and dangleberries. I think I love him!"


Paul Henry

New Zealand Not Laughing At Dikshit

A New Zealand television host has quit his job over a dispute relating to his mispronunciation of Sheila Dikshit's fairly awkward and obviously humorous name. "You can't tell me that her name isn't hilarious," the disgruntled host allegedly or possibly never said. "Any New Zealander who can't see the humor in this is a disgrace to our great nation and should pack up and move to America, with all of their ridiculous political correctness and pink fucking everything all over the place."


buns

Flooding in Rio

Massive flooding in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, has prompted thousands of sleek, sexy Brazilian women to throw off their clothing and swim to work in the nude. "We are Brazilian," one anonymous nude woman said. "We won't let a little thing like water stop us from living our lives. We can swim like fish." The American Embassy in Brazil has reported a different type of flood, one consisting of American photographers flying into Rio to photograph the amazing spectacle. "I can't really blame them," Ambassador Keanue Reeves was reported to have said. "These Brazilian women are super hot."


GGW

Aliens Signaling Earth with a Special Offer

Australian astronomer Ragbir Bhathal claims to have detected a signal from the vicinity of Gliese 581g, the planet in the zone of habitability for life. He explained, "I have deciphered the signal and determined that it is an advertisement for "Girls Gone Wild" DVDs. I have ordered 10 of them so that I can study this new alien life form at play. It is all for the efforts of science."


Elle Navarro

Loonies On The Path

Yesterday in traffic I noticed a high level of lunacy and rage on the part of drivers. All I knew was that a cold front had been replaced with a warm front, my knee was hurting and rain was expected. I had assumed the hot weather following the cold was to blame. But then I read about the earthquake in Oklahoma and it made more sense to me. The worst traffic I have ever seen, with the most insanely aggressive and lunatic behavior, was the day before a major earthquake in Illinois. I was going to write another Loonies on the Path post about it, but I just never got around to it. So this is it.


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