The above photo has nothing to do with anything. I just thought it was interesting. The stock market is killing me. I'm thinking about becoming a bank robber and giving up on all this emerging market, diversified portfolio, hedge fund, gold futures, dividend paying chaos. Just think of the excitement! And the payoff is almost always guaranteed to be better than most stocks. I mean, unless the bank you rob is completely empty for some strange reason.
Oh I know, but don't worry about me. I'm not like those idiots in L.A. who wore all the right body armor except for the headgear. I'll have the whole kit and kaboodle, complete with AK47 and lots and lots of Kevlar. And I won't try to make my illustrious getaway in an old Oldsmobile Cutlass 4 cyclinder like they did. I'll have something much faster and more durable than that, just in case I need to ram my way past the cops, like a Hummer or a Bronco.
Yeah, I've got this all planned out. First I rob banks to raise millions of dollars. Then I go to the Bahamas and live like a pimp for the rest of my life.
So, who wants to be one of my many, many ho bitches? I promise free gold and diamond jewelry to the first 10 hotties who sign on. How can you resist?
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