My favorite Australian radio DJ got into a pseudo-argument the other day with a man over her statement that she's married, but she doesn't NEED a man. She proudly spouted off all the usual feminist rhetoric about being a strong, independent woman and not needing a man. Then added, 'but I choose to have one in my life.'
The dispute that resulted was easily predictable, as it happens frequently. She quotes the dogma of the feminist church of female supremacy, thinking her statement is merely one of proud independence, and then is shocked when men are insulted by it. What's the deal here?
That's what SHE said:
She explained to the caller, who was mercilessly harassing both her statement and her Aussie accent (which he imitated very badly), that what she MEANT was: 'I don't need a man in my life. I can do it all by myself. But I choose to have one because I want to. ' She didn't see anything wrong with this statement and clearly failed to understand why the caller, or any man, might have a problem with it.
Here is what HE heard:
'I don't value men. I can take them or leave them and be just as happy either way. If every man on the earth dropped dead, I honestly believe my life wouldn't change in the least. I see no real use for men in this world and do not feel that I benefit from their existence at all. They are merely window-dressing, something to be played with or admired for a short time and then cast aside at the first sign of the slightest inconvenience or boredom.'
Let me explain it another way. I have several cars. I drive a 4-wheel-drive truck most of the time. But I own a 1970 Chevelle SS454 musclecar which mostly just sits in my garage and pees transmission fluid all over the floor. It's shiny and pretty and makes a lovely rumbly noise when I start the engine, but the fact is, I don't NEED it.
My truck, on the other hand, I DO need. I drive it everywhere I go and without it I would be stranded. I NEED my truck. But I don't NEED my musclecar. It's just a toy.
If a tornado hit my house tomorrow and crushed my garage, squashing my musclecar into scrap metal, I would be upset for the loss of the garage and then call my insurance agent to see how much money I was getting for my destroyed musclecar. I would not cry for the car. After a week or so I wouldn't really even miss the car. I don't NEED it, therefore the loss of it would not change my life one tiny bit.
I do NEED my wife, though. If the tornado crushed the house and killed her, I would be quite upset. I would cry and miss her and my life would suddenly have a large gaping hole in it for the loss of her. Things she did which I took for granted would suddenly not get done and I would be stretched to my limits trying to take up all the work she did for me in addition to my own pre-existing workload. Emotionally I would be deeply wounded by her loss. I would be affected by it. I would be hurt by it. I would go on without her, but it would not be easy and I would be upset for a long time to come.
When a man hears a woman say, "I don't NEED a man, I merely choose to have one" what he hears is "I would not cry one single tear if he died tomorrow. I am fine without him. I can do it all with the greatest of ease all by myself. He adds nothing significant to my life. To hell with "for better or for worse" and all that crap. The minute things get difficult between him and I, he is going to be tossed out into the street. I'll sue him for alimony and child support and generally ruin his life because all he is to me is a meaningless object, an extra paycheck, a pair of hands to help me around the house which can easily be replaced with a maid or a gardener. My new iPhone means more to me than he does. I don't need a man, but I need my cellphone."
Men don't often go where they aren't wanted. Especially where women are concerned, men avoid women with hostility towards men like the plague she will inevitably become. Thanks to the Marxist identity politics of feminism, men have for the last 40 years or more been walking on eggshells trying never to say or do anything that in any way offends the perpetually offended feminist women of the West. It is an impossible task and leaves us exhausted and hurting much of the time, silently wishing that women would one day stop hating us so much and finally love us just a little bit as much as we love them.
I went to a bar the other night. There was a woman there who seemed to have it all. She was blonde and beautiful and had the looks of a movie star or supermodel. She strolled in confidently and quietly sat herself down alone at the bar. I watched her off and on all night, waiting for the men to swarm in and try desperately to get her attention.
But no one ever did. Not one man sat down on either side of her or spoke to her even once. After awhile, she got bored and left, looking a bit discouraged as she went out the door. She was a woman who appeared not to need a man. People tend to assume things about one another based on looks and her looks said that she was successful and well-off and independent, in need of no one and nothing. And so the men took the perceived message to heart and left her alone. It happens all the time.
I know a woman who is a wealthy adviser to several mega-rich individuals in various countries. She's all the time taking trips all over the world, joyrides in exotic sports cars, flights in her private plane which she pilots herself, and partying with celebrities. She's beautiful to look at, the sort of woman that attracts men's attention when she enters a room. She's even modeled in magazines. She's got it all - looks, money, success, and confidence in spades. One thing she does not have, though, is anyone in her life to share any of it with.
According to the values of feminism, this woman is the ideal, she's got money and power and everything she 'needs', and the fact that she has no one to love is utterly meaningless. Money and power are their goals. Everything they do is designed to increase women's wealth and power over men, while decreasing men's wealth and power down to absolute zero, if possible. Love is rarely acknowledged in feminist circles, except when used to push some sort of political agenda, such as gay marriage. Once the political goal is achieved, all talk of 'love' disappears. In the world of feminist identity politics, love is merely a word, a tool that can be utilized when needed to elicit the desired emotional response from the target audience. It is something used to manipulate, but never truly understood.
I've heard a lot of women over the years say "I don't NEED a man" only to later bitterly complain when they ultimately find themselves without one. Sometimes I think women don't realize just how much men are affected by the things women say. We don't always respond to the things they say and so they incorrectly assume we weren't listening or didn't care. We do care. We care a lot.
A few years ago a columnist named Kathleen Parker wrote an article about how sick and tired she was of all the male-bashing in American society and our media. She said that she appreciated men and all the things which we do for women. She didn't dress the article up and rattle any sabers as if expecting a significant response. It was a casually written, from-the-heart article about something that just happened to bug her. The response she received from men was so intense and unexpected that she wrote a second article just to respond to the responses. She said that men were writing to her from all over to tell her that they had NEVER before heard any woman say much of anything nice about men or that they valued men in any way. The outpouring of gratitude and emotion from her male readers was unlike anything she said she had ever experienced before. Men who had never even heard of her had received the article in their email from friends and felt such overwhelming gratitude for what she had said that they felt compelled to write her and say 'thank you!' Some of the men confessed to even crying as they read her article.
In the book of Genesis, it says God created Adam as the first man. Adam was alone except for the animals. Adam had all the power and control any feminist could ever wish for. But Adam was unhappy. Apparently God looked at Adam without Eve and said "it is NOT good." I think it is a mistake to say that men and women don't need each other. The mere fact that we could theoretically survive, grow old, and die without each other is not the same as not needing each other. What good is a world without love? What happiness is there in a world in which the only love we ever experience is the love of ourselves?
A woman who says "I don't need a man" is saying to men "go away and leave me alone", regardless of whether she intends it this way or not. Men hear this message loud and clear. And we go elsewhere, in search of a woman we can love and be loved by in return.
Don't you NEED love?
You have read this article but sometimes a little rough sex can be good /
love is all you need /
too
with the title Misandric Monday - that's what SHE said - "I don't need a man". You can bookmark this page URL http://thebohemianbunny.blogspot.com/2009/08/misandric-monday-that-what-she-said-don.html. Thanks!
