A wedding occurred just outside Govan in Glasgow. To keep tradition going, everyone got extremely drunk and the bride's and groom's families have a storming row and begin wrecking the reception room and generally kicking the living daylights out of each other.
The Police get called in to break up the fight. The following week, all members of both families appear in court.
The fight continues in the court room until the Judge finally brings calm with the use of his hammer, shouting "Silence in Court".
The court room goes silent and Ronnie (the best man) stands up and says "Judge... I was the best man at the wedding and I think I should explain what happened".
The Judge agrees and asks Ronnie to take the stand.
Ronnie begins his explanation by telling the court that it is traditional in a Govan wedding that the Best Man gets the first dance with the Bride.
The judge says "OK".
"Well", said Ronnie, "After I had finished the first dance, the music kept going, so I continued dancing to the second song, and after that the music kept going and I was dancing to the third song, when all of a sudden the Groom leapt over the table, ran towards us and gave the Bride an unmerciful kick right between her legs".
Shocked, the Judge instantly responded, "God that must have hurt!"
"HURT!" Ronnie replies "The bastard broke three of my fingers!"
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