Woman at Work

I was assigned to work with a woman on a big project. She is very pretty and seems to be fairly smart. She always dresses well and looks flawless. Most of the men here at work are attracted to her, especially since she's single. But they are all married so it's just too bad for them.



To her credit, for a woman so attractive she is surprisingly friendly and nice. I know few women as attractive as she is who are as approachable. Even so, I swear I see something in her eyes.



I realize that few men have any ability at all for figuring out what women are thinking from just looking in their eyes. I am certainly no master of women's minds, but I know what I think I see.



When I look in this woman's eyes and she looks back at me I swear I see her thinking: "I have a gun. If you ask me for a date or anything that might be mistaken for a date I'll projectile vomit right in your face. Tell me you didn't mean to wear that shirt with those pants. Who gave you that awful haircut? You smell like onions. You bought that watch at Wal*Mart, didn't you? I hear you drive a dirty old truck. Stop looking at my ass. Stop talking to my chest. Just say what you came to say and move along. I would rather die than to ever be trapped alone in a room with you for any reason."



So, as you can see I don't think she likes me much at all. She's nice enough to me. And I need her help from time to time. But I get a pretty strong impression that she would rather chew off her arm than to be friends with me.



I wonder if I really do smell like onions?

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