Yellow and Purple Home

Last weekend My Wife and I went to my old home town to visit with some old high school friends. We followed my MapQuest map out into the middle of nowhere until we came to a large house sitting all alone at the top of a hill. The house was bright yellow with purple window frames, sitting on 10 acres of land. This had to be the place.

We pulled up the long driveway and parked in back. There were already a large number of cars and trucks and vans there. As soon as I got out I spotted several people I recognized from years ago. People slowly acknowledged that they had seen me and waved. "Hi!"

Pretty soon we were drinking beer, burping and farting, and making jokes about pretty much the same things we made jokes about in high school.

"BUUUUUURRPP!" Kelly can burp like nobody's business. And she's barely 5' tall. Where does it come from?

Sam showed us around her house. It is fantastic, 3100 square feet of lived in real life home. While we were upstairs viewing the bedrooms her littlest girl was in the hallway playing a video game on the TV. Suddenly the girl let out a loud, "MOOOOOMMMMMMIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" I looked out to see what she was screaming for. There was a man on the TV screen stroking what appeared to be a 15 inch long penis.

"Uh, you might want to see this," I said to Sam. At first she didn't seem to be sure if I was serious, but she finally came out to check. By the time she got out into the hall the TV had flicked back to the video game.

"What?" she asked.

"I swear there was a porn movie playing," I said, confused. So Sam hit the EJECT button on the VCR and out popped a lovely porno movie.

"Where did THIS come from?" Sam said genuinely shocked.

As we went down the stairs she turned to me and said, "I am SO disappointed in my little girl's reaction to a naked man and his huge penis." Then she smiled a familiar devilish smile that I hadn't seen in 20 years. I laughed.

This is such a fun place!

The search for the owner of the video ended with a surprise. Don, Sam's husband, said "That's ours. I was going to throw it away because it's worn out. I must have left it on the table down here somewhere." Sam blushed and nothing more was said about the video. With Don and Sam's sense of humor there is no telling if he was being serious or not.

At some point a bunch of us ended up sitting in the living room. Lisa sat in the middle of the room. Her husband was outside somewhere. Kevin sat to the left of me near the windows. Kelly, his wife, sat to the right side of the room, right next to Lisa. Everyone was talking about their kids. Kelly burped and it echoed off the high, smooth ceiling to make a lovely sound. We all applauded because, you must understand, there is absolutely no one in the world who can burp like Kelly. It is a gift from God.

Sam came in and sat down next to Kelly. They told stories of various wild adventures they'd had together in the years since I last saw them. Apparently the surest way to start trouble is to leave Kelly and Sam alone together. Sam's husband, Don, came in and stood behind her. He seemed to agree that leaving Sam and Kelly alone together was dangerous. We all talked and laughed for a long time.

Eventually we ended up in the huge den with Sam and Kelly battling each other in "You Don't Know Jack" on the computer. Diane told us how she prefered to walk around nude at home when she was single. After Diane married Ian she said his sons had one by one accidently walked in on her naked. At that point she figured they'd all seen her naked and so it didn't matter if they saw her again. So it was back to walking around naked. As she was telling us this all the little kids had climbed into the hand made pine entertainment center and closed the doors. A wave of giggles flowed out from within.

Diane put "Rocky Horror Picture Show" in the VCR and we watched it while talking and remembering people from high school. The kids became confused by the men dressed in women's clothes and slowly left the room to play elsewhere. Somewhere along the way we drifted into a conversation about how old Susan Sarandon was when she made the film.

At some point Kelly tackled Sam and tickled her until her face turned purple. We all laughed. As it began to get late my friends slowly headed toward the door. One couple at a time they gathered up their kids and loaded their cars. Melissa and I started to go when the last couple was leaving. But Sam said we should stay and talk. We hadn't seen each other in the longest time.

Sam's son came driving up the driveway as we stood there outside still talking. He is a football star. His girlfriend, who was with him, is a cheerleader. He was just voted Most Popular. Sam joked about being the anti-jock girl in high school and now having a teenage son who is Mr. Football.

We went back inside and talked for several more hours, until Sam finally fell asleep on the couch. We said goodbye to her husband and her sister. Sam was worn out. My wife and I slowly drove away. I was sad to leave. That had been more than just a reunion at someone's house. That house was a real home. And it was filled with some of the best friends I ever had.
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