It's another Fuck You Friday.
The elections are over, but the fun has only just begun:
Ah, NOW you call it ‘embryonic’, after the election is over. Interesting how that works.
Christian, Muslim Britons say leave Christmas alone
Apparently even the Muslims are sick and tired of the antiChristers’ constant attacks on Christian beliefs. Good for them! “If I am not for me, who will be? If I am for myself alone, who am I? And if not now, when?”
Hunger seen as big enemy in war on AIDS
I thought people didn’t want war. Weren’t we just told that the results of the last election meant “stop the war” and all that? Funny how none of the newly empowered antiwar crowd has said a word about our soldiers still in
"Sexist" urinals sell out
Apparently The People didn’t see anything sexist about them. They liked them. These sold out fast.
He drives awfully fast, for a dead guy
This guy must be in
Wo/man accused of running down ex-husband
According to the Violence Against Wo/men Act, as rewritten by the National Organization for Wo/men and passed by a Republican-controlled Congress who didn’t even read it, s/he is to be assumed to have been retaliating for years of abuse, even if s/he wasn’t, and is thus the only ‘real victim’ under the law. The dead man must be charged with he/r crime. Seriously.
Race disparities persist in U.S.
Perhaps that’s because people are different and cannot be made to be the same no matter how hard our overmedicated, underworked, wealthy, elitist, social-engineers try to force us all to be. It’s funny how ‘liberal’ used to mean a person who believed in the right of every person to be an individual whereas now it has come to mean a person who absolutely will not tolerate anyone who doesn’t fit their preconceived notions and prejudices of what a person of a particular race or sex should be. Arrogance and intolerance would thus appear to be a very progressive disease.
Most wo/men in the dark about HPV
Bullshit! The commercials are on constantly. You can’t escape them. They’re on during football. They’re on during Scrubs. They’re on during House and Medium and Two and a Half Men. They’re on in the morning. They’re on in the evening. They’re on every channel. You couldn’t not know unless you don’t have a TV, newspaper, or magazine subscription.
Patents still blocking drugs for poor: activists
Basically what they’re saying is that they want the government to eliminate all patents, thus driving manufacturers of medicines out of business and assuring no medicine for anyone, much as they had in the
Red meat may raise breast cancer risk
Breast cancer being essentially the only cancer receiving any significant funding for study, as Americans clearly consider the breast to be the most vital bodypart of all.
Student says his drug test is foolproof
Dude, I smoked a shitload of weed and it like totally busted me! It’s awesome! Now I'm gonna patent and sell this drug test for a shitload of money to buy more weed.
Pair accused of 'overt' plane activity
It is now a federal offense to have sex on an airplane. Isn’t that lovely? Just the sort of dangerous activity we all need protecting from. But don’t you dare profile any Muslims!
Sanitation worker's honesty doesn't pay
Only God apparently respects honesty anymore. That money is long gone, man.
Inmate allegedly urged to strip for pie
Alright, I'm naked. Now you get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie!
South Africa parliament OKs gay marriage
Is it just me or is there irony in the AIDS capital of the world OKing gay marriage?
U.N. sleuths find plutonium at Iran atom site
And just like the WMD which were in fact found in
Holocaust denier goes on trial in Germany
This is what happens when people aren’t permitted the right to disagree, sort of like on college campuses and corporate offices here in the United States.
Rights groups file war crimes suit against Rumsfeld
Can we file a war crimes suit against Lincoln, Roosevelt, and Kennedy while we’re at it? Oh, and
U.N. agency: unclear if Iran's nuclear aims peaceful
Unclear? UNCLEAR?! WTF?!!!
'Homeless dumping' charges for hospital
Seriously, you wanna know how to drive all your city’s hospitals into bankruptcy? Yes? Charge them for dumping homeless people and Medicade people and all that. They are running on a shoestring as it is.
Doctor ordered to pay for unwanted baby
This is a fabulous example of government in action. A doctor in
Man accidentally shoots himself in groin
Ghetto gangstas are more interested in looking cool than anything else, so when they see fools on TV shoving guns in their pants they imitate this. When this fool did it the gun went off and shot off his left testicle, causing him to involuntarily jerk forward in pain, which caused the gun to fire again, shooting him in the leg. And all of this was over a pair of cheap-assed stereo speakers. Yeah buddy.
Government says NATO has not found needed troops yet
Where exactly do you ‘find’ troops? Are they just wandering around the streets, looking for a country to invade? Is this how NATO works? Do they just walk around at night going, "hey you, wanna invade a country?"
Bush warns N. Korea: Don't spread nukes
And
Europeans OK anti-obesity charter
First we’ll define it as a disability. Then we’ll get the government to try to “solve” the problem. Then we’ll create special courts to try people for “obesity crimes.” And then we’ll implement obesity support, where a man who is thin has to pay some fat person for the rest of their life in order to guarantee their “right” to eat Twinkies. Somehow thin people are going to be demonized and punished in all this. You know it’s true. If there’s one constant in politics it’s the power of jealousy, pettiness, and resentment by illogical and emotional masses of selfish morons.
UCLA police stun student in ID dispute
Another taser dance courtesy of the police. This one was performed on a UCLA student in the library who didn’t have his student ID. Later they might even serve a no-knock warrant on his dorm and have SWAT shoot all the drunk sorority girls they find there. We call this ‘security’ people. You should all feel safer for it. But seriously, the guy was apparently acting like a total ass, and seeing as there have been serial killers praying on students in
Pelosi makes history as fe/male speaker
Yeah, I’m sure THAT was her WHOLE motivation throughout her entire career. And if you believe that OJ Simpson has a book he'd like to sell you.
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