I Remember #6

I remember when Starsky and Hutch was a cop show on TV and we always got their names backwards.

I remember banana seats and spyder bikes and baskets.

I remember UTotem being the only convenience store, back before there were Circle C's and Mapcos all over the place.

I remember a world filled with Volkswagens and Mustangs. Remember the VW Squareback? How about the Karmann Ghia?

I remember Burger King, Burger Chef, Burger Queen, and Dairy Queen.

I remember Beta video.

I remember laser disc video players. My sister has one.

I remember Datsun.

I remember my dad going to work every day in a white shirt with a tie and wearing ugly black framed glasses.

I remember Shazam, Isis, and Electra Woman and Dyna Girl.

I remember when I was so skinny people would harass me for it.

I remember when Kate Jackson, Jaqueline Smith, and Farrah Fawcett were Charlie's Angels and were the hottest women on TV.

I remember Lee Majors and the Six Million Dollar Man.

I remember Robbie Knievel.

I remember the AMC Pacer.

I remember bellbottoms and patches and torn jeans and long hair.

I remember when the trees were bigger and the grass was greener. The cars were bigger and the streets were wider. And the hair was bigger, too, much bigger.

I remember Abba and shiny silver disco clothes and women with no bras wearing their shiny shirts unbottoned down to their bellybutton.

I remember Roger Moore and James Bond in outer space.

I remember The Pink Panther and Peter Sellers.

I remember digging through the Boy Scout magazine recycle dumpster desperately searching for issues of Playboy or Hustler or Cherry magazine.

I remember when you could buy a real M80 and blow the shit out of stuff.

I remember cherry bombs and exploding mailboxes.

I remember when pickup trucks had rifle racks and rifles in them and no one thought anything about it.

I remember seeing the very first Taser on "That's Incredible" with Cathy Lee Crosby in her shiny silver shirt with no bra unbuttoned down to her bellybotton. They got a man out of the audience and shot him with the taser and it really messed him up.

I remember The Bionic Woman and the oh so gay Bionic Dog.

I remember Micronauts.

I remember spyder bikes and banana seats.

I remember when Nike was new, or maybe it was just new to me.

I remember the Datsun B210.

I remember the Triump TR7.

I remember who shot JR.

I remember watching "The Wonderful World of Disney" on TV.

I remember seeing the movie "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" when I was a little bitty kid. You hardly ever see that one anymore.

I remember when ads for financial instututions and colleges actually had white males in them, and not just in the background, out of focus, or as comedy relief.

I remember when Jimmy Carter sent troops into Iran and bungled the whole thing.

I remember the day Ronald Reagan was elected president, the Iranian terrorists suddenly released all the hostages.

I remember my dad coming home from work, complaining about being passed over for promotions because he was the wrong sex and the wrong race according to the U.S. Government. He got so fed up that he took early retirement. But they kept calling him for help for years after because they needed him.

I remember big cars made of steel, with loud horns and huge engines.

I remember when Bill Murray was a regular cast member on Saturday Night Live.

I remember Ghost Busters. Who ya gonna call?

I remember when people said Night Ranger was going to be the next big thing, but I thought they mostly sucked.

I remember glam metal bands and their sudden demise with the arrival of Kurt Cobain and Nirvana.
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