I was watching NFL football today and I noticed something. I've commented on this in the past, but it has gotten much worse lately. In most of the commercials run during the football games there were no white males. And in most of the commercials, including commercials for GM trucks, it was all white women and one black man, whom we are instructed to believe are the designers of all their vehicles (Hmm, that might explain a lot if it were true.) It doesn't seem to matter what is being sold, it's all white women and one black man - no white males at all, unless there's a 'moron role' to be played, in which case it's always a white male. Welcome to the new "tolerant" America, where hating Whitey and The Man is all the rage, and denial and hypocrisy is how we excuse it. "Do these jeans make my butt look fat?" "No, honey, but even if they do it's the White Man's fault. And they totally don't. Much."
Now, getting back to football, I saw the end of the Denver Broncos vs San Diego Chargers game. I was for the Broncos. But good God, that was a fumble and San Diego recovered it. End of story! That referee must be right now sitting in a bar with the Cubs fan who grabbed a playable ball and sent the Cubs into a death spiral when they had a lock on getting to the World Series, drinking tequila and talking about how life sucks. Michael Richards is probably their bartender. I mean, talk about your bad calls. He was behind the quarterback. He couldn't SEE when the ball came out. He shouldn't have made the call because he couldn't see. Oh, I am SO familiar with asshole refs who guess on a call when they couldn't see and get it totally wrong. If I hadn't been getting carried off the field to the hospital at the time I would have beaten the shit out of the last ref to do that to me. Dumbass motherfucker! Anyway, my point is simply that Denver lost that game and they knew it. That's why the coach said to go for 2. I guess he figured if they didn't make it then the game came out as it should have. And if they did, then God was smiling on them today and they might as well just enjoy their good luck. Which they did. Because it was a shit call. Also, San Diego was pissed as hell, and that kind of righteous anger can lead a team to discover a new fire inside and really kick some ass in Overtime. I'm sure Denver's coach didn't want to see that. Going for 2 points was a good choice.
So we've been having Hurricane Week all week here in the southern half of the United States of No White Males Allowed. Hurricane Obama tore through Texas, ripping up Galveston and Houston, before galloping on up to Dallas and rolling on by, grazing Memphis as it headed up towards Chicago. I guess maybe the hurricane wanted to see the Cubs play? It could have stopped in Houston if that were the case. They were supposed to play there when it hit, so the game had to be moved.
This hurricane seems to have been affecting people's brains, including mine. And gas is insane. Due to political interference in our free market economy by dumbass politicians over the past many years, a huge percentage of our oil refineries are all located in the Gulf, virtually stacked on top of each other because, you know, Democrats hate 'urban sprawl' so they made them do that. Anyway, every time a hurricane rips through there it does a number on our fuel supply. I had to drive from North Alabama to Memphis, Tennessee, with gas lines and panicked drivers all over the place. I drove like Jimmy Carter, doing about 55 mph the whole way, barely accelerating from red lights, and managed to get tremendous gas mileage from my giant 4-wheel-drive truck even if it did bore the living shit out of me. Gas has gone up and in some stations they are out of the cheaper grades of gas altogether, with no more shipments scheduled for awhile. Most of this shortage was caused by everyone panicking in unison and running out to fill their tanks even though they didn't need to. It was awesome seeing the gas lines again. I haven't seen those since I was a little kid. Yeeha!
My cats were totally freaked out by the hurricane, too. For the past several days My Wife has been calling and telling me that their eyes are solid black, they follow her everywhere she goes, and they don't make a sound. When I got home I saw what she meant. They were walking around like they expected a wolf to jump out and eat them at any moment, crouching low and everything. And this was in the house. They wouldn't even go outside at all. THAT is unusual for my cats.
I myself have been somewhat muddle-headed during the hurricane. I wrote a few emails to people who either didn't reply or else asked me if I was on drugs. I tried commenting on various blogs, only to find everything I wrote to be weird and pointless. I deleted some of it because it made no damn sense. Apparently I didn't delete it fast enough, though. Someone is mad as hell at me right now.
I tried to reply to comments on my own blog during this time, but again, everything that I wrote was just weird. I had to give it up. I hope this post at least makes some sort of sense. I guess I'll know tomorrow, when I see if anyone had any reaction at all.
I heard that Saturday Night Live convinced Tina Fey to come back just so she could play Sarah Palin. I have to say, I can't see anyone else but Tina Fey playing her. She looks JUST LIKE HER.
I heard that the ever-controversial and openly biased Oprah Winfrey, High Priestess of political correctness, had Barry Obama on her show, had Josephine Biden on her show, but refuses to allow Sarah Palin to be on her show. Hmm, that's typical. People are acting all shocked at the unfairness of it all, but I'm not. Where have these people been? How is this a surprise to anyone? Seriously people, pull your heads out of your asses.
The weirdest actor ever from the original Star Trek series, Mr. Sulu, has married his gay lover in California. This made me laugh because every time I saw him doing some guest appearance on various sitcoms over the past 10 years or so I blurted out, "good God, he's so gay!" I had no idea he actually was gay. Other than boosting my confidence that I have spectacular Gaydar, I could actually care less about this news. It's only a matter of time before we hear that California has legalized interspecies marriage so that Paris Hilton can marry her stupid little dog. I'm totally serious. You wait and see - it will happen in our lifetimes.
There is a fuel pump at a Philips 66 gas station in Mississippi that doesn't shut off when your tank is full. I know this because it spewed gasoline out of the side of my truck in a very expensive golden shower while I was cleaning the bugs off my windshield. Yay me.
I thought I had something more to say ...
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