"It's like balancing a brick on top of a croissant - it's a delicate situation," she said, with complete seriousness.
"What?!" I asked, assuming she was trying to be funny.
"Balancing a brick on top of a croissant," she repeated.
I looked at her long and hard. She was clueless.
"That's just really funny," I said, and then started searching around in her purse for a pen so I could write it down.
"What" she exclaimed, fully aware that I was going to write this in the list of 'wifeisms' and put it on the internet tonight. I pulled out my little Philips camera and took a photo of her laughing because the sun was hitting her just right.
At supper we sat at a tiny table over in the corner, with the sun streaming in just on us. It was as cozy and private as it gets in a jam packed Olive Garden restaurant. And as we sat, eating our meal, My Lovely Wife was doing this:
FART! "Giggle giggle."
(5 minutes later)
FART! "Giggle giggle."
On and on this went, thoughout the meal, My Wife farting and giggling to herself. I felt grateful in that it required absolutely nothing of me to keep her entertained. Her own stress-induced gas was all she needed.
But I do feel a little sorry for the people who got our table after we left.
And farts or no farts, we had a fabulous time tonight.
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