Memphipedia - unPC words and phrases

In light of the dramatic rise of the billionaire American Marxist supported Church of Female Supremacy, Gay Power, Political Correctness, and the AntiChrist (ACLU), I feel it necessary to explain to the confused citizens of the English-speaking world the REAL meanings of some suddenly controversial words and phrases.



fag

Fag

an English cigarette, not to be confused with Pete Doherty, who is simply an English drug addict. Both are usually found lit and emit a constant stream of smoke, but only one has ever been inside Kate Moss's hu ha (as far as we know.)

Usage: oy, gimme a faggot, you git, else I'll bust you up.


Faggot

a bundle of sticks, not to be confused with a group of Brazilian supermodels all standing close together, although the resemblence is uncanny.

Usage: Boy, go out inter dem woods 'n git me a faggot fer da stove so we kin eat.


Gay

happy, not to be confused with the state of perpetually lusting after a blow job in the men's bathroom. Just a general sense of well-being. Has nothing to do with anal sex or Disney.

Usage: Richard Simmons seems totally gay all the time. He's the most upbeat guy I've ever seen.




Nappy

a baby's diaper (England). Usually made of cotton. Not to be confused with an old t-shirt held up with a belt, or a worn-out pair of Momma's panties and clothes pins, or crumped up newspaper held on with duct tape (Ireland).

Usage: Good Lord, Ethel, change that baby's nappy before I die from the stench! He's peeling the wallpaper right off the walls with that smell!


Ho

a garden tool. Alternate spelling: hoe

a prostitute. Alternate spelling: whore

a fat man in a red suit laughing. As in: "ho ho ho, Merry Christmas" (phrase no longer permitted in most Western nations due to recent laws prohibiting religious freedom (Christians only) and free speech.)

a phrase shouted at a horse to make him stop. Also see: whoa

Usage: bitch, look'it them weeds! When was the last time you ho'd that garden?


leona

Bitch

a female dog.

Usage: Leona Helmsley died and left all her money to her bitch, but nothing to her grandkids. She was a nasty old twat to the bitter end.


Diversity

no white males. Also common, no white, Asian or Indian males. Increasingly common, no males at all.

Usage: we need more diversity at this company. Let's fire all the white men.


Moral Relativism

religious fanaticism and annihilation disguised as pacifism. Common usage is to apply moral relativism to any belief that Christians hold, ultimately negating it, while simultaneously holding a position of moral absolutism in support of the opposite belief.

Usage: We will not permit any displays relating to Christmas or Easter because it offends non-Christians. Also, there will be no food permitted on the premises during Ramadan because our Muslim coworkers are fasting. Participation in our charitable giving via the United Way is mandatory, and if I hear one more person complain about the fact that they use our money to support over 100 radical feminist causes and not one single Christian, pro-family, or pro-male organization, that person will be terminated immediately. Remember, 'judge not lest ye be judged' and thrown into prison for a hate-crime for daring to voice opposition to our beliefs.


Tolerance

A celebration of anything destructive or evil, as defined by the Christian Bible. Usually a tax-payer funded, minority-supported, majority-opposed, federally legislated push in support of anything sexist against males, heterophobic, racist against whites, anti-Christian, anti-family, anti-American, prohibiting freedom of speech or religion, eliminating rights to life, liberty or the pursuit of happiness, anything dark, evil, and clearly wrong to anyone who isn't using drugs, or just generally anything nasty.

Usage: we should all learn to be more tolerant and stop criticizing the Vagina Monogues' scene in which a lesbian brags of raping a very young girl in order to twist her sexuality and turn her into a lesbian, too. There can be no tolerance for intolerance!


So there you have it: a brief but fairly accurate explanation of some of the words and phrases recently prohibited, or encouraged by the PC priestesses and their eunuchs.


"Let us prey ... "
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