Name: Nude Memphis Steve
Birthday: Once per year
Birthplace: Hospital
Current location: My desk
Eye Color: Which eye? Both are brown.
Hair color: Again, which one? Some are brown. Increasingly I find gray ones.
Height: Currently I’m sitting down, so that would make me about 4 feet tall.
Handed-ness: Depends on what I’m doing.
Heritage: The Socialists stole my heritage. I intend to get it back.
Shoes you wore today: Both are mine.
Your weakness: Testicles, same as every other guy.
Goal You Want To Achieve This Year: Better home.
Thoughts while waking up: Mmm? Wha? Eh? Mmmm. ZZZZZ
Your Most Missed Memory: I can’t find my memory of my first sex. I left it right there but now it’s gone.
Pepsi or Coke: Coke.
McD's or Burger King: Either one. Currently Burger King is closer.
Single Or Group Dates: I haven’t dated a group since I was in college.
Lipton or Nestea: I ask, “do you have sweet tea” and if they say “yes” I say, “I’ll have that, then.”
Chocolate or Vanilla? Mix’em together and squish’em between two hot waffles and you’ve got a party in your mouth!
Cappucino or Coffee: What’s in the pot? I’ll drink it if I'm tired.
Smoke? Only when I’m on fire or having sex.
Swear? Have you ever read my blog?
Shower or Bath? We can do either or both together. You tell me.
Been in Love? Yes.
College? Yes, and probably going back for more classes if I don’t get some good opportunities in my field soon.
Married? Yes, to Mrs. Nude Memphis. And she thought it was hilarious when I told her you guys call her that.
Believe in yourself? I believe I exist. How odd would it be if I didn’t?
Motion sickness? Not that I can recall.
Do you think you are attractive? Yes, to mosquitoes.
Are you a health freak? No, but I try to slow the deterioration with exercise as much as I can.
Do you get along with your parents? If I try real hard.
Like thunderstorms? Yes, but I’d like them better if I could get a decent lightning photo.
Instrument? Used to play piano. Then guitar. Now I play the radio. I'm pretty good at the radio.
In the past month, have you..
Drank alcohol: I don’t know what it was, but it may have been alcohol.
Smoked: Well, I’ve inhaled quite a bit of second-hand. Does that count?
Done drugs: Lots of Clarinex, baby, I’m a rebel!
Gone on a date: Every Friday night.
Gone to the mall: Um, I think it was within the past month. Lots of hot chicks there, let me tell you.
Eaten cookies: Yes. But we just called her 'Cook' for short. Man, that was a long time ago.
Eaten sushi: No, it was … what the hell do they wrap in seaweed? I ate that.
Been on stage: Not in the past month, no.
Been dumped: In marriage, you get dumped and picked up again from time to time.
Skinny dipped: In the shower.
Stolen anything: I just stole this from Stacy’s blog.
Ever...
Been drunk: I’m not so think as you drunk I am, Oliver.
Called a Tease: They don’t call men ‘tease.’ They call us ‘asshole’ if we don’t catch on and put out when they want us to.
Been beaten up: Been beaten on, but not up. Never lost a fistfight yet. But there’s still time.
How do you want to die: Rich, good-looking, and famous.
What do you want to be? The richest, best-looking, most famous man in the world.
Country you'd like to visit: Australia and its’ famous nude beaches.
Best clothing style: Nude with toilet.
Drugs I've taken: Name any allergy drug and I’ve taken it.
CDs: That would be several blogs long. Yes, I have some CDs.
Piercings: One unintentional one from a collision between my shin and Grandma Hakanson’s old iron lawn furniture outside the King’s house at 12 midnight on a moonless night. Tony watched the blood spewing out of my leg and just laughed. I was less amused.
Tattoos: Boss, the plane! The Plane!
Number of things I regret: More than I can count. Can I get a do-over?
